Life is rarely linear

Well, it has been over a year since I posted.....alot has been going on and I think it is time for me to get back in the groove of things and begin posting more. I truly blelieve it really helps put things into perspective at times.

Let's see, where to start. The kids and I have been back in Kansas for a little more than a year now. I have been working as a paramedic both in the emergency room at a local hospital as well as the local EMS. I love what I do, although I don't love the extended periods away from the kids. I have taken on a large challenge this past year and in a mere 56 days, it will be complete! I have been in nursing school and will graduate in May! I am SO SO excited, while this, in addition to my jobs and the kids has been time consuming, not to mention stressful, it will be worth it in the end. Telling myself this daily has been what has gotten me through this. None of this has been without sacrifices though....from all 3 of us. A whole new world and journey is about to commence!

A recap of other events in the past year.....I lost my grandmother in September from Alzheimers, God rest her soul she is not suffering anymore. I also lost a grandfather in October to cancer that was suddenly diagnosed and gave him minimal days before the end. Grandpa Val will be missed but he will be at peace being with the love of his life, Grandma Dolli. I have been reunited with lots of friends from when we lived here before and it has been great, have made several new friends, enjoy spending time with some of my family (even though it is very limited right now with my schedule) but all the while, missing my close friends back in Montana. One thing I have learned about myself is as I age, I must become more laid back and kinda go with the flow because not as much bothers me and I have found I am dealing with stressors in my life easier.

I have also had to learn that sometimes, whether we want them to or not, our children grow up, they become their own person, and we have to let go and hope with all our might that everything we have taught them in their formative years will be enough to sustain them. Alyssa, my oldest and only daughter, moved out in December. While she is not quite 18, the sacrifices made by all of us took their toll on her, as well as the budding of her "not quite a kid, not quite an adult" phase in her life took over. I also believe this is another case proving how beneficial it can be for a teenage girl to have her father in her life. She is living with her dad, only about 20 minutes from me. While this was like a large blow and hard to swallow, over the past few weeks, it has brought us closer together and taken our relationship to a different level. I am SO proud of how she has blossomed and into the young lady she is.

Rylen is almost as tall as I am (although that doesn't take much!) He is growing into a nice, confident young man. He enjoyed playing football for the first year this past fall and I look forward to watching games through the years with him. He is definitely developing his own opinions and thoughts about life and the way it "should be" but nonetheless, it is never boring here.

I have met someone, someone who I hold dear to my heart, and am looking forward to spending more time with him and his kids. He is a man among men who I thought were non-existent anymore. He is a man who is stronger than I ever thought were possible and takes life as it comes, rolls with the punches, and keeps trudging laong with a smile on his face. I am anxious to see what the future holds for us.

I am most definitely going to be blogging more in the coming weeks, I have missed it.

The most important thing I have learned int he past year is - Life is rarely linear, there will always be zigzags on the way to your goals!